Divorce rates may be stagnant, but they are still at an all-time high. While many people will talk about asking the right questions when getting married, they will rarely reflect on the right questions before planning for divorce. 

If you feel frustrated with your partner and marriage, and feel divorce is the only way out, then it is important to ask yourself the right questions before going ahead initiating the process. This is particularly the case if you have been married for over a decade and more. Your assets are probably combined, and your children are probably grown – planning for a future alone may be scary. 

1. Why do I want to get divorced?

It may be difficult to be objective with a question like this, but boredom in a marriage isn’t always solved by divorcing. Many couples reach a point where routine can become monotonous and mundane. It could be time to change things rather than run for a divorce.

2. How will it affect my children?

If you’ve been married for around 20 years, then it is likely that you have a teen or adult children. How will divorce affect them? Are you experiencing empty nest syndrome? How will your children react? For many adult children, while they wish their parents to be happy rather than be in an unhappy marriage, they also want their parents to get on. It is difficult to be expected to take sides.  Just because your children are adults does not mean they will find it easy. You will need to be prepared for this.

3. How do I feel about dating or marrying again?

If you are someone who does not enjoy being alone, then it is worth thinking about how you will feel about entering the dating scene after 20 years. While many may find it exciting, it can also be daunting and disappointing. Those you date are likely to have separated from their partner and have children and possibly grandchildren in their lives.  There is a lot to deal with in repartnering. Instead of potentially victim to the “grass is always greener” mentality, it might be worth thinking about whether it is worth investing more in your current relationship.

4. Can I give up other relationships?

Divorce isn’t just about losing a life partner. If you get on with your parents in law, for example, it may mean ending that relationship too. Moreover, if you have couple friends, you may find that people stop inviting you over too. Divorce will mean a change of dynamics and while hopefully you will maintain your friendships and those important in your life, there may be relationship casualties that you did not anticipate.  It is important to accept that there will be a lot of change in many of your personal relationships.

Pentana Stanton Family Lawyers

If you have mulled over every consequence of divorce and still believe it is the right path for your marriage, then it is time to contact your local law firm. 

At Pentana Stanton Lawyers our professional team of experienced family lawyers can guide you through the divorce process, ensuring that you have a fair and agreeable outcome. We can help negotiate an out of court agreement, and if necessary, we can also represent you in court too. Get in touch today and we will assist you all the way.